My aunt is coming next week and I’m super-excited. It’s actually been a couple of years since I’ve seen her and this is the first time she’ll be to my house since my daughter was three. That’s a long time ago baby.
It’s not that she hates my house…well, maybe she does, but that’s not the point. Since she has a nice big house with lots of extra rooms and a pantry filled with snacks, we usually go to her house. Plus, she lives in the sunny, warm place called Georgia. Also known as the strip mall capital of the world.
But this time, she’s coming to my house. One word for you people – CLEANING.
Aparently I don’t do it enough. I tend to read blogs and write posts in my spare time, when in fact, I should be cleaning. I just discovered I have a dust bunny farm in my bedroom. It’s like I’m raising them for sale at the farmer’s market.
I’ve had three days of sweeping, mopping, swiping, chucking, scrubbing, spraying, and organizing. I’m ready to embrace my lazy side once again. Life shouldn’t be lived with a dust rag hanging off your belt. I smell like lavender all purpose cleaner and although it’s a pretty purple color, it’s not exactly par-fume.
Did I mention I’ve been dieting these past five days? I have. I would say I could eat a horse, but I only have plastic horses in the house and they don’t have enough calories to fulfill my cravings.
You know what I realized yesterday?
Every single time I walk into a gas station or convience store, thousands of seductive calories claw at my arms and legs. They captivate my eyes and make me drool on my gloves a little. It’s true. When did gas stations go from filling your car to filling your internal desires to eat everything under the sun as long as it’s drizzled with a little chocolate?
That’s what I want to know.
In between my hundred calorie cream of wheat and my glass of flavorless water, I organized my son’s Legos. It’s a projected he’s wanted to do for a long time, but we put if off. Mainly because organizers costs twenty-bucks a pop and he needed a few; however, he got some Christmas money. Although I think it may push the nerdy line a little, he spent his Christmas money on organizers. Four to be exact.
If I didn’t help him, it would take him the next six months to seperate bricks. I don’t have six months. I need a clean house by Monday!
I used a day and half (believe me it took that long) of my life sorting Legos. Not how I imagined my new year would begin, but I can now seperate a Lego from a cheap imposter on feel alone. It’s like the skills bankers have for detecting bogus money, only in my house it’s Legos. If you bring counterfit building bricks to my house, you could face up to five years in jail.
And if my kid ever dumps all those little bins onto the floor, someone may have to restrain me. A day and half of my life people!
Then I made playdo with FringeKid. Yes, I think it’s infinitely easier to go and buy a little container of cool smelling colored dough, but after a day on the floor with red, green, blue, yellow, gray, and black bricks, I wasn’t changing out of my pajamas.
Despite recent fashion trends, I don’t go shopping in my pajamas.
Just thought I just share.
I made a dinosaur embryo with my playdo. Don’t judge my creativity people. I lost half my brain to 1/2 inch toy bricks.
Wish me luck on my home overhaul. If you don’t hear from me by Monday, send Mr. Clean.
P.S. Please excuse the wretched photography. I would like to blame one of the kids, but it was me.