If you are new to the domestic fringe, I am entertaining reader questions. See this post. I must say, for as much as my mother laughed at this question, it also sent her into a panic.
She called right away. “You’re not really going to show the insides of your closets, are you?”
To her dismay, I’d already snapped the pictures.
It’s all guts and gore today.
How about pictures of all of your drawers and closets?!??! Yes, we want to know all of your secrets and how you keep your linen closet organized….
I preface these pictures by saying, you already know my weak spot and you’re hitting below the belt. NOT NICE!
You’re not going to believe this, but a legion of tiny gremlins invaded my home and destroyed my neatly organized closets. I slept right through the chaos and when I awoke, I shuddered in fright at the sight.
I could have shown tons of pictures of my nice, neat little home. On the surface everything seems very organized and spacious. I don’t like my living space to be overly cluttered, and I’ve even been complimented on my organizational skills.
FringeMan is appalled when these compliments are granted and I graciously accept them without a flutter to my lashes.
For you see, he knows the truth. He opens the closets everyday.
His heart and mind scream “FACADE!”
There is a method to my madness. What appears to be disorganization is really the secret to snoop proofing my home.
A nosey guest arrives (they always come for a look-see), and midway through the evening she excuses herself to use the restroom. While you’re busy serving, clearing, and being entertaining, she’s catching quick glimpses of your drawers and closets. She’s learning all your secrets and possibly taking pictures to use as blackmail.
The contents of my snoop-proof closets avalanche at this unsuspecting guest the moment the door is cracked.
I hear the thud and muffled scream – the sound of a woman being buried alive in towels.
I smile in delight.
She’s been caught in the act and possibly reformed for life. I’ve accomplished in one evening what years of therapy could not.
I’ve rid the world of a snoop.
Yes, I keep the coffee with the pans. Save it for the comments section!
If you’d like to send the organization fairy, I’ll email you my address. She’s always welcome!
Maybe she has discounts for repeat consults.
Are you happy Sara? The guts, the gore, the glitz – it’s all yours!