Fashionable Frump – Style Alert

I rarely speak of fashion, because frankly, I’m not the one to pick out your wardrobe; however, if you’d like to go shopping, I will definitely give you my too big opinion and force you to try on hideous outfits that I’m sure will flatter your figure.  It will be loads of fun and I’m available for consult…wait, let me check my schedule…any time.

Being awake before the birds is something I loathe.  If you’ve been visiting the domestic fringe for any length of time, you know I’m not a morning person.  It’s no use pretending otherwise, because if you ever call before 9am, I will utter gibberish and we’ll have to repeat the conversation later in the day.  Today I was up before dawn.  Thankfully no-one spoke to me.

In my pre-coffee, blurry eyed state, I realized that fashion was the topic of the day.  Perhaps it’s because retailers are uncompromisingly hopeful that the freeze-misers will release their frigid grip from our land and the daffodils will once again bloom.  I don’t know for sure.

Because I care about you, I want you to know that I’ve heard it rumored that pleated pants with tapered legs are on trend for Spring. (For my source, click here.)  At best I follow trends loosely.  If you looked into my closet, you’d be hard-pressed to find a style or even a decade.  Let’s just say that I blur the lines between couture and thrift; however, I just finished teaching FringeMan how walk into a store, find a pair of flat-front pants and purchase them.  It’s the only style advice he will now heed.  Don’t tell him pleats are back and whatever you do, do not tell my legs tapered pants want me.  They are perfectly comfortable lounging in a wide-leg denim.  Thoughts of tapered legs automatically reduce blood supply to my feet and increase the size of my hips by six boxes of Twinkies.

I’ve also heard that there’s “a big new idea” in the fashion industry.  It’s called, and I quote, “Modesty”.  Who would have thunk it?  What will we look at if women’s cleavage no longer captivates our eyes?  (For my source, click here.)

That my friends concludes my chat on fashion.  Anytime you want up-to-the-minute style advice, give me a call.  I’d be happy to discuss your wardrobe as I sit in my sweatpants, fake fur-lined crocks, T-shirt from 1993, my sister-in-law’s cast-off red sweatshirt, and my Victoria Secret’s heavy bathrobe circa 1997.


It’s cold.


  1. says

    I love your post!!! Tapered pants only look good on 3 people and we don’t like those people. I just ordered myself some more trouser jeans. Hooray for nice wide legs!!!

    I have some awards for you at my blog if you’d like them!!!

  2. robinaltman says

    Who, on this earth (not a planet in a distant universe), would look good in pleated, tapered pants? I was reading a magazine the other day, and actually thought to myself that I should get a cute miniskirt in beige tulle, to go with my olive army jackety blazer. Then I thought, “Robin – what on earth are you thinking? Have you gone insane?”, and I had a cookie.

  3. says

    Fringe Girl, you and I are soulmate writer dressers. I do clean up nice when I go out, but in my own little study, I’m in my own little fashion world. And it ain’t pretty, but it’s COMFORTABLE!!!

    LOVE, Love this blog!

  4. says

    Your outfit sounds like something I’d wear when at home. I’ve been wearing my hubby’s old sweat pants that are way too long, but have elastic at the ankles so it doesn’t matter. A black turtleneck and a faded blue Winnie the Pooh and Eeyore shirt at home to keep warm. Oh and black sparkley leg warmers and black socks and brown fake leather moccasin type house shoes. See, now your outfit doesn’t sound that bad, does it?

  5. says

    I’m not looking forward to tapered pants! With our glamorous body shape they just make us look even more voluptuous and no one can handle that!

  6. Chrissy says

    I don’t care who the source is, I am NOT wearing pleated tapered pants. My favorite trend is scarves. I’m addicted to them…the kind that can be worn year round. The soft, lineny kind. I have so many and always feel that I need more. Dark denim is also a favorite thing. Slimming and dressier. Heels with jeans=good. Animal prints, shiny metallics, tapered pants…I don’t care who’s wearing it or who says I should, not gonna do it :)

  7. Jenn says

    You crack me up!! Thanks for the fashion update. Modesty??? WOW!! Wonder where they ever came up with an idea like that!!!!


Please Leave A Comment