Living a Monday Life

Although Mondays only come once a week, sometimes I find myself stuck in the rut of living a Monday life.  Thankfully these ruts don’t usually last too long.  If my entire life were a Monday life, I think I’d need a shrink, sedatives, and a daily cup of calming tea…maybe spiked.

Right now I’m in a little bit of a Monday rut.  Yesterday my car died.  Thankfully FringeMan and I were out together or else he’d have to come rescue me and since we only have one car, it would be a terribly long bike ride for him.  As it was, we had to walk several miles to purchase a new battery.  Poor FringeMan lugged a battery that weighed about 70 pounds.  Luckily he’s tough, because I’m not.  I would have sat curbside crying until somebody carried it for me.

Things could have been much worse for us, this could have been our car.


At least we are still sticky-note free.

Anyway, I figured that walk covered my ‘work out’ time for the day and I’d never looked so good working out.  I usually trudge to gym without makeup, with yesterday’s hair, and wearing paint stained sweats.  This time I was working out in the cutest brown dress from Target and purple Vera Wang Egyptian type sandals.  I’ve never looked so good in sweat and frizzy hair and I even managed to step over the used condom littering the sidewalk.

The rain even held off until the battery was changed and the car running.  That’s a miracle!

I’m beginning to think I live in a rain forest.  My kids get upset because I leave the water running while brushing my teeth.  Ok, I admit it!  All of New York’s water waste is from me brushing my teeth.  Fish hardly have any fresh water left, frogs are going extinct, and we are in jeopardy of not being able to get 6-8 full glasses of water daily  ALL BECAUSE I LET THE WATER RUN WHILE BRUSHING MY TEETH!

I think my son has convinced his teachers to set-up a camera over my sink to catch me in the act.  “Hello, my name is Tricia and I’m an environmental hazard.”

The truth is I’m happy being a water waster.  I’m not ready for change.

And there’s certainly no shortage of water in Long Island.  It’s rained for two straight months!  Not even my daughter can take enough baths to use up all our excess water.  I’m thinking of investing in a boat to use for grocery shopping and the turtles are hopping puddles and ending up on my doorstep.

100_3957This little guy was waiting for us after church on Sunday.

100_3958People, I don’t even live near a pond.  These turtles are becoming disoriented.  They’ve mistaken roads for streams, front yards for lakes, and my doorstep for home.

100_3959My friend Jeannie, the mail order bride turned pastry chef, called me last week to share her own turtle tale.  I told her to stick it in her bathtub and keep it as a pet.

100_3960I don’t take my own advice.  NEVER.

100_3962I’m unsure of this turtle’s fate.  I wish him all the best that turtle life offers.  I do hope he finds a turtlet, produces many offspring, and lives happily ever after in a million dollar pond.

I also hope the sun starts shining soon.  Don’t get me wrong, we’ve seen daylight for maybe an hour right before or after it pours for 72 straight hours.

I may go to a tanning bed with my book and a lemonade and pretend I’m at the beach.

While the vehicle problems, rain, and turtles all added much excitement to my Monday, the highlight was when FringeKid came home from school.

100_3967First, I want you to know that I have no idea who she takes after.  The glasses, the lei, the bracelets and polka dots….you’d never catch me wearing anything even remotely similar.

Second, behind the stars in her eyes was a headache, runny nose, and fever.  She’s in isolation.  I locked her in the shed.

Just kidding.

She’s cuddled on the couch with her pillow, blankets and dog watching a Fragle Rock DVD FringeMan brought home from the library last night.

Since I’ve spent so much time sitting in doctor’s waiting rooms, I’m nearly a medical professional and I diagnose quite well; however, I’m hoping I won’t have to diagnose this one.  There’s swine flu, strep throat, and fifth’s disease going around her school.  I’m guessing it’s not strep throat because her throat doesn’t hurt.  I told you, I’m good.  I’m hoping it’s fifth’s disease because she’s had it twice and it’s really no big deal.  I’m praying it’s not swine flu because I hate hearing my children oink.

Thank God today is NOT Monday!

Forgive me for torturing you with this post.  Tomorrow’s will be short and have a point.  I promise!

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  1. So happy to find your blog (through the Mincy house!)

    Love turtles. And, yeah, we actually keep them. We have a just-in-case tank by the nature shelf. With amphibian food set next to it. Really.

    Love the girlie’s outfit. Great taste, little trend-setter.
    Hope she gets well soon!

  2. “Hate hearing my child oink” – hilarious!!!

    Hope your week gets better!

  3. And here I was feeling like I was short in the “random” reading category.

    My tank is full again! What a relief!

  4. Hope everything is better tomorrow! I love the turtle. He’s so cute! But I’m glad he’s yours and not mine. lol

  5. Fifth’s disease? WTF? Your blog is incredibily funny. I had it save on my favorites and now I know why. I will be back!

  6. robinaltman says:

    My boys went through that annoying “You’re wasting water when you wash your face” phase. What are they teaching these kids in school? Don’t they know that boys are smelly and grungy and will use any excuse not to shower?

    I like the picture of the turtle stretching his neck. Shouldn’t he be hiding away in his shell, though? You really should give him a good talking to.

    May all future Mondays be better than this one!

  7. Thanks for the sticky-notes-on-car idea. I will definitely be using that one. Now to just decide who my victim will be. Hmmm …

  8. Are you ever NOT funny? Really, ever?

    Hope your little one gets better soon.

  9. ooooh ! fraggle rock !!!!!

  10. LOL!!

    And you know what the sad thing is that stuck in my brain after reading this post?

    I really need to get some post its…and have fun with a friend…hehehe.

  11. You have been posting on my blog for awhile and I have somehow missed yours but I’m here now and loving it! Hope your FringeKid is feeling better soon!

  12. You NAILED it. I had never thought to call it a Monday Life, but I know exactly what you are talking about.

    Sorry about the cutie poo walk to get a battery.

    And Mr. Turtle *shudder* I don’t know when I turned into such a chicken about critters.

    Hope that the rest of your week feels like Hump Day.

  13. Okay, I smiled my way through the entire post. What a ride, what a Monday you’ve had!
    I hear the sun is due to make an appearance by tomorrow….hopefully that’ll be enough to reorient the turtles and save you from the tanning booth.

  14. Has Fringekid been in my closet? She rocks!
    Love the turtle’s coloration. It doesn’t look quite real, but from the look on FringeBoy’s face I know it is. How do you know it is a boy turtle?
    On the sidewalk…kinda makes you go, HUH? Really? Truthfully, I don’t want to know how it got there!
    BTW, I leave the water running when brushing my teeth and when I am washing my face. Don’t tell your children!

  15. We are finally having some sun, after it raining everyday for 3 weeks. I will send some your way!

  16. What a great Monday post! Can we have some of y’alls’ rain? We’re in a hot mess drought here.

    I really like your blog’s layout. Nice, organized and easy on the eyes.

  17. Fringeboy is looking snazzy. I like that sideways smile he’s got. Triple A, Tricia. AAA. No long walks in Vera Wang necessary. Pack up your lemonade and book everywhere you go. Then when you break down, call the 1-800 number, settle back and wait. They will come and make your problems go away and you can relax for a few minutes. I, too, liked the long, rambling. It was nice reading, actually. ~Mindy

  18. We are having a turtle invasion, too! I think you just gave me tomorrow’s blog : )

    The good news is that it’s Tuesday! Things always improve exponentially as the week draws on, so today should be fabulous by comparison…

    I’m sending you a package of sunshine you should get right… about… now!

  19. I like the long, pointless posts. That is an Eastern Box Turtle. Box turtles live on land, not in water. Hope you didn’t put it in the bathtub.

  20. Oh dear, hope FringeKid is feeling better soon!

    Did you ever hear the little song from Sesame Street about not being a water “waste-er-roo”? We still use that word!

    Hopefully, it will be all Fridays for you soon!

  21. Poor Tricia, thank goodness Monday only comes once a week. FringeBoy finally let you get some photos with nice smiles. From now on, let him hold turtles when you want a picture of him!
    As far as the outfit on FringeKid—I think I have some pics of you with outfits that were somewhat similar. That apple is still “clinging” to the tree.
    Prayers that she is feeling better soon.

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