Dare to Wear day has finally arrived. No hairy hineys or feathered fannys…I warned you I wouldn’t do it. The rules for Dare to Wear were easy – wear something you don’t normally wear or participate in a trend you said you’d never participate in.
Finding something to wear wasn’t so simple. You see, after you’ve spent a day walking around town like this…
it’s hard to think of something you wouldn’t wear.
FringeMan wasn’t much help. He told me to close my eyes and randomly pick something from my closet and it would be weird enough to pass for Dare to Wear. Not very nice.
Do these clothes look odd to you? No, of course not…me either. I simply have an array of colors and patterns brightening my closet. Of course, I have been teased quite a bit for my fashion taste. If someone thinks it’s THAT bad, please do me the favor of nominating me to be a guest on What Not To Wear. I’ve actually seriously considered nominating FringeMan. You should see what he wears and to church no less! Maybe I’ll sneak a camera into his closet.
I went to Target (one of my favorite stores) and searched high and low for something odd. Now, you must remember that I’m working within a budget. I did find a hat that I would NEVER normally buy. I wear a straw hat for a day at the beach and in Maine, I even put a winter hat on…extreme temperatures will make you loose all care for your hair.
This type of hat I’d never wear, except for today. I also found some 80’s style knee socks. I have bad memories of wearing knee socks to church as a child. I despise knee socks almost as much as I despise spandex leggings. They just don’t look good on me.
I carry the majority of my weight in my bottom half. Trust me, I’ve had my fat calibrated by a perky, thin, somewhat annoying blond. I don’t recommend it. Anyway, my legs rise like sturdy tree trunks bearing the mother-load. Sometimes its’ bark resembles fine, dark coarse hair. Not today. I’ll have to tell you about the hairy leg party I hosted. Right now you want to see my socks.
If it’s not bad enough that these are knee socks, they look like a sweater I had when I was ten. Can you see how thin these socks are stretched? My fat is overflowing the top band. I may loose circulation.
Look at all the white fibers peering though! I’m pretending these are someone else’s legs…humor me, ok. Don’t correct me.
What kind of shoes does a girl wear with knee socks? I couldn’t figure it out so I wore these fabulous Vera Wang heels I found on clearence for under $10. I wore them for six months before I realized they were two different sizes. I’m a bit slow at times. They are the most cofortable heels I own…in both sizes. I LOVE these shoes.
FringeMan suggested this dress because he thinks it’s odd. I, however, like it. Don’t worry I saved the tags and I’m not going to wear it that long…just incase I want to return it. Shhh, don’t tell anyone at Target.
What do you think? Should I keep the dress? I’m stuck with the hat and the socks are stretched wide enough to go on over a moose’s leg. For the record, I do realize that none of these items of clothing actually work together. I know that, but who cares – it’s dare to wear, right?