The internet is chock-full of parenting advice, maternal coping mechanisms, balms for the soul, guilt assuagers, rest for the weary, and pick-me-ups for the gloomy.
It is an overwhelming place for this mom who doesn’t put that much thought into her daily routine of rearing her children.
No Cost English Lesson: We rear children and raise cattle. It’s not how we usually speak, but it’s a rule. Every time I break it, I feel guilty.
Does that sound terrible?
Should I be heaping guilt upon my head like I heap ice-cream into bowls?
Am I bad mom who lacks all the ninja, good-feeling parenting skills that other mothers have?
Someone recently asked me to share more about how FringeMan and I parent our children.
To tell you the truth, I feel terribly under-qualified to talk about this.
Lean in a little, because I’m going to whisper this.
I don’t put a whole lot of thought into how I parent.
I know. Shake your heads and wag your tongues. It’s tragic in this day and age, isn’t it?
I should be more enlightened.
I should stress out more about the details, be more in-tuned with how I’m shaping a young mind.
I know. I KNOW!
I read articles about it all the time.
It’s just that we apparently take a no fuss approach to parenting.
I never, ever would have thought that, because we’ve got rules; I mean, every house has rules, but I didn’t post them anywhere in twenty-four colors. So, sometimes I forget some of the rules. My kids do too.
They never remember to brush their teeth.
It’s the first thing I start saying when I walk downstairs in the morning. I continue this chant through my first and second cups of decaf coffee.
Sidenote: I think I only drink coffee for the flavored creamers.
They leave dirty socks on the living room floor all the time.
All. The. Time.
It drives me crazy.
Sometimes I go on a tirade about socks. I get all wild banshee and everyone runs to put their socks in the hamper. The next day, the socks are on the floor.
That’s life in my house. We all kind of roll with it.
I don’t write an ode to my rule-breaking, bad breath children. I don’t mourn the fact that I yelled at them to pick-up their socks. We don’t think that much in my house. We just kind of do what needs to be done, so we can get on with life.
Does that make any sense at all?
Please don’t get the wrong idea. We are actively engaged in our children’s lives.
We just don’t believe every little action or reaction requires soul searching, prayer and fasting, and twenty-five parenting must-reads.
In the words of a now famous Youtube video star, “Ain’t nobody got time for that!”
So in this series, I will attempt to explain life in our house, more specifically how we parent.
I am certain you’ll love me one day and hate me the next.
I’ll just pretend you’re my kids.
In this series, I will not tell you how to parent; however, I will address a reader question and tell you how I (we, but I’m the one with all the words) parent our two children.
Should be interesting.
Other Topics In This Series
How I Taught My Children to Sit Still in Church
How Frugal Living Affects My Children
5 Reasons I Put my Kids to Bed Early
Other Parenting Posts…
Giving Our Girls A Voice – In a world filled with bullies and bad choices, I want my daughter to have a voice that will be heard.
A Few Things Every Parent Should Know
To The Mom Who Doesn’t Recognize The Woman in The Mirror
Minimalist Parenting: Is the pressure too much?
Book Review: Minimalist Parenting
Sue Gerard-Schelinski says
Like what you do! I remember as a child my aunt asking her daughter to put her toys away because it was time for dinner. She kept on playing. I’ll never forget my aunt casually walking over with the broom and dustpan and sweeping up her doll, opening the wood stove and dumping the doll into the fire. Now that was drastic. I might have done it earlier with a less precious toy, but the lesson was sure. I learned in a parenting class later in regards to a teenage boy who refused to clean his room. His mother replied, “That’s OK, I’ll take care of it! She hired a cleaning woman for $20 an hour to do the job and put his bike in the pawn shop to pay for it. When the boy found out and said, “You can’t do that I’ll call the police” she replied, “I already did”. When she explained how to get the bike back, he took some of his stuff to the pawn dealer who replied, “I don’t want this junk, bring me some good stuff!” Needless to say the next time she asked him to clean his room, she didn’t need to say, “That’s OK, I’ll take care of it! Tough love!
Oh my gosh. I found you! FINALLY! Someone who thinks like me!!!! 😀 I’m so happy!!!!!
Woops, sorry, I got a little carried away with the punctuation up there.
I just really can’t tell you how much I agree with you. I have people ask me what I think about things and how I’ll do this and why I do that. I always say that I didn’t really think about it. I just figure when something comes along, I’ll deal with it, by/with God’s grace. I believe in consistency and love…and that’s about it. I think it’s ok to just roll with the punches.
Occasionally I’ll wonder if there’s something wrong with me because I don’t worry the same way other moms do (I do worry, just not the same way, I guess). I wonder if my kids might be missing out. Then I think, eh, I made it through life alright (My mom died when I was 14, but gave us a great base of love). I just have to love my baby (or babies some day, perhaps) and be fair and consistent with my discipline.
No fuss parenting. This is officially my favorite term. Don’t mind if I steal it. I plan to read your blog often, now that I’ve found it. So nice to have found you.
Keep up the great work!!! (woops, there I go again with the exclaimation marks. It’s just a day to exclaim, I guess.)
Kristen Hamilton says
Oh, Tricia…you are my kindred-spirit when it comes to mothering! Love this post and your candid sharing! xo
Oooh, no fuss parenting. I like it. There’s far too much “fuss” in life, already.
Charming's Mama says
Yeah, quit “shoulding” all over yourself. We all can only do so much and try to do our best, God will take care of the rest. That’s what I call no-fuss parenting.
I became a mama only 11 months ago. If your kids were still babies I would ask you to include your thoughts on breastfeeding vs. formula, brand of diapers, co-sleeping, attachment parenting, organic baby food, and I can list many more topics that get young moms into each other hairs. (I stay out of those heated discussions) To me no fuss parenting means do what works for me and my baby/children, and ditch the 25 parenting must reads! I’m really looking forward to the rest of the series.
Looking forward to it!
Oh i am too much the opposite. I do something and then almost immediatly thing i have ruined their psychee. Uhhgggg. I so need some no fuss. Some “oh well, thats how we roll.” Lol. Learning.
I’m calmed by your honest, common sense, no-fuss approach! Thanks for sharing yourself as an example! Looking forward to the series.
Sounds great! My parenting post would be along the lines of a Berenstain Bears book (in fact, I did write something like that…haha): This is what you should not do…
I’m pumped. Pretty sure I fall into the same category, although I’ve had much less time to prove it. I don’t believe that all things need fuss. Can’t wait to see this series!