Priorities – 7 Practical Tips for Setting Priorities

Our priorities get really screwed-up sometimes. Don’t they?

Work, home, family, church, activities, sports, Netflix, FB, friends….because there are so many things and people pulling us in different directions, we often don’t have the time or clarity of mind to realize that our priorities are out-of-order.

We struggle with fear, anxiety, depression, STRESS, feelings of worthlessness, failure, rejection, and hopelessness. We often can’t sleep. We have tons of bad habits: we overeat, we don’t take care of ourselves, we yell at our kids, we fight with our husbands, we are negative, we are a roller-coaster of emotion. We are constantly faced with our own failure.

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Jeremiah 29:11

I can’t speak for other generations, but this generation of mine puts a lot of pressure on people to succeed – to do it all and to do it well. There are countless opportunities to fill our schedules. It seems like we can’t escape MORE: more activity, more work, more exercise, more hobbies, more toys, more houses, more options. If we’re not careful, life gets overwhelming.

Here’s the thing. We can try really, really hard to have it all and to do it all, but in reality, we can only successfully do a few things at a time. That’s why we need to evaluate our priorities and decide which things are important for us to do now. Those things may not be the same as they were a year ago, and they probably won’t be the same today as they are going to be two years from now. We live dynamic lives in a rapidly changing world, so consistently re-evaluating our priorities makes sense.

I absolutely believe we are capable of accomplishing great things, doing anything and everything we want to do, but we’re probably not going to be able to all those things at once.

When our priorities are in line with our values and the way we want to live, we are accomplishing the most important things for us. We have less stress, we sleep better, and we feel better. Like myself, many of you prioritize your faith. We believe God has plans for us, and they are good plans, meant to bless us and bring us peace, so we can in-turn bless those around us and bring that peace and hope to them.

How do we do this? How do we identify what is important and prioritize it? How do we cut things out of our lives, possibly even some good things? How in the world do we know what God has for us in this season of life?

Here’s the thing: I’m going to share some principles with you and some common sense, but I’m not going to pretend to know God’s plan for you. That’s between you and God. I have enough on my plate with my own life, and too often I drop everything I’m holding and make a giant mess. Then I have to re-prioritize and decide for myself what needs to be on my plate and what needs to be thrown in the trash. You know?

Here’s a rundown of my common sense prioritizing strategies:

1. Silence the noise.
2. Be honest with yourself.
3. Free yourself from other people’s expectations.
4. Get the mind of God.
5. Be clear about your purpose.
6. Create follow-through.
7. Get it done.

Nobody is too busy. It’s all a matter of priorities.

 

Silence the noise.

Be still and know He’s God.

We can’t know God or pretend to hear His voice if we are so busy, so full of stress and anxiety, and so darn tired that we can’t even think straight, much less be still and know He’s God.

It’s hard to be still.

Frankly, it’s not in my nature to be still, and I suspect many of you are like this too. This world is a busy place full of opportunities. It’s easy to get caught up in the doing and completely forget about being. If you want to take an honest look at your life, what’s working and what is not working, then you have to make a place to be still, a place where you can get alone with God and your thoughts and take inventory.

God can’t work his way into our heads and hearts, when our lives are filled with noise and chaos. He just doesn’t work that way.

The Bible is filled with verses telling us to be still, to draw nigh to God, to wait on Him, and those are the hardest things for us to do. It’s probably not going to happen in just ten minutes of quiet time either. God is neither our good luck charm nor is He our genie in a bottle. We can’t slap open our Bibles or pull up a devotional app on our phone, read three words and expect God to show up and grant us our three wishes. 

Sometimes we have to clear our plates clean, cut out all the noise, and draw nigh to God. Maybe that will be for a day or a week, or a month, or maybe it’s going to take a year. God doesn’t work on our time schedule. Believe me, I wish He would, but He’s not in a rush.

Where does the noise come from?

It may be over-involvement in activities (for ourselves or our kids), it may be pressure from family and friends, it may perceived pressure from media, it may be too much entertainment. Maybe you need a media fast??

This will look different for all of us, but create some quiet space, so you can think, pray, meditate, and take inventory of your life. If you’re a mom of little kids, this may mean waking up extra early for a couple of days or weeks, or locking yourself in the bathroom, or begging your mom to babysit. I know it’s not easy, but carve out some personal quiet space for yourself. Make it your first priority!

 

Be honest with yourself.

See yourself as you are. Don’t simply focus on the negative things and the failures, because that’s only part of the story. Chances are when you sit down and think about it, you’ve had tons of recent successes. They don’t have to be great big accomplishments, because sometimes success is making it through a day without throwing all your kids toys in the trash or banishing your husband to the doghouse for the next twenty years of marriage.

None of us are perfect and most of us aren’t even where we want to be. Growth is good and should be continual. Don’t use someone else as a ruler to measure the success and failure in your own life. You are you, with your own set of strengths, weaknesses, problems, and blessings. You don’t have to be like anyone else, because God created you to be you on purpose. You are beautiful and strong and capable of impacting the lives of those around you. You have purpose and hope.

You probably have some things you want to change about yourself too. That’s just what this exercise on setting priorities can help you accomplish, but be honest with yourself.

If you sit down and make a list of all you’re doing in life and you find every single thing on your list is negative, you’re probably evaluating things through a dirty lens. If you evaluate your life and can’t find one area that’s out of balance or where you need to grow, then take off your rose-colored glasses and ask your spouse or a friend for their opinion. They’ll help you see yourself more clearly.

 

Free yourself from others expectations.

Recently I was talking to someone about the importance of education and kids getting the skills they need to be successful. This person said, “Yes, look what a good education did for you.”

Except, they caught themselves right before they said “you” (meaning me). They paused, and then mentioned someone else.

At one time, and not very long ago, that would have completely crushed me, because I feel the weight of other people’s expectations.

The Lord has worked long and hard on me over this issue, and I don’t struggle quite as much anymore, so instead of feeling crushed, I burst out laughing and I called them out. I had to get to the place where I freed myself from other people’s ideas of what I should and should not be doing with my life, so I could focus on the things that are most important to me. Meeting other people’s expectations will never feel as good as living in the freedom.

It’s hard and sometimes it hurts, but isn’t it better to work for what you want most rather than what you want now?

Think about it for a minute. If we know what we want most, isn’t it better to sacrifice what we want now, so we can focus on what we want most??

This delayed gratification has recently been a theme in my own life, and it’s really helped me to focus on what I want to do the most – the best things and not just the good things.

 

Get the mind of God.

If your faith is important to you, aligning your priorities with God’s Word will also be important.

“My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” declares the LORD. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways And My thoughts than your thoughts.  Is. 55:8-9

In general, what does God want from us?

Everything can really be boiled down to two things: Love God and Love your neighbor as yourself.

It may seem simplistic, but we have the tendency to completely over-complicate things.

Love God. Is He really a priority in our lives or does he get the scraps? Does He only get the scraps on a good day??  Our walk with Him is a relationship and relationships take time. You’ve got to be all in.

Who is your neighbor?

Our neighbors are those who are closest to us.

Who is living closest to you?

Your husband? Kids? Parents? The person literally living next door to you? The person you go to church with, work with??

Are we loving and serving these people as ourselves. Do we have time to love and serve these people who God has placed in our lives, or are we too busy?. Maybe we need to re-prioritize so we have the time and mental clarity to serve and love our husbands, kids, and neighbors.

I don’t know what few things God has for you to be doing well at this time in your life, but I know that God doesn’t measure success in the same way this world measures success. I know God wants peace for us (and not just peace in the absence of trials, but peace through the trials). I know He has a plan and a purpose for each of us, and I know without a doubt that the busyness of this world clouds our vision sometimes. We end up piling our plates high with so many good things, but we don’t need lots of good things. We need God’s best.

Be clear about your purpose.

Be clear about your purpose or you will be pulled in a million different directions, accomplishing nothing of value.

Companies often create a mission statement that clearly outlines their purpose and reflects their values. It may be helpful for you to make a mission statement for your life. The exercise alone will help focus your mind and heart, so you can see what’s really important to you.

Another thing that’s helpful is to look at yourself from a future perspective. When you look back on how you’re spending your days, does it line up with your purpose? Will you look back and be pleased with how you spent your time?

Choose between busy work and doing things that make a real difference. When we have no clear purpose for our time, it gets filled with busy work or waste. It’s like money, if you’re not telling it what to do and where to go, it will disappear. We all get the same hours in a day. It’s not a lack of time, it’s a lack of purpose for that time.

What great things are you sacrificing when you allow your life to be filled with busy?  We can’t do it all at the same time, so something suffers. Make sure how you’re spending your time is aligned with your purpose, goals, and plans.

The future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is.

“The Screwtape Letters” (1942)

Create follow-through.

Recently I was talking to someone about their New Year’s resolutions. They told me their resolution, and then I asked them what their plan was to accomplish that resolution. They hadn’t thought about the plan until that moment, because no-one had asked that follow-up question. A resolution without a plan is a pipe dream. We can have wonderful intentions for our lives, but if we don’t create follow-through, our intentions won’t get us anywhere.

Once you identify your purpose and prioritize accordingly, create some follow-through. Think about the steps it’s going to take to accomplish that goal and make yourself an action plan.

For instance, one of my priorities is walking 10,000 steps a day. I can say I want to accomplish that goal all day long, but if I don’t give myself a plan for walking, I’m going to fail every single day. If I want to walk 10,000 steps a day, I need to figure out how many steps I need to walk per hour. I also need to carve out blocks of time to get on the treadmill and get outside. I need follow-through. It’s the same for everything we want to accomplish in life.

Get it done.

Now that you’ve silenced the noise, taken inventory, found your purpose, and created a plan for yourself, go get it done. Don’t wait to start implementing your new priorities. Sometimes we get the idea that we have to wait for a milestone moment, but we should begin now. Don’t wait until the new year or until the kids are in school or until after your vacation, incorporate those new priorities into your life now.

There may be an adjustment period, because you’re going in a new direction, but be patient with yourself. Keep moving forward. It may mean saying no to certain things and yes to other things. Just keep focused and get it done. You can do it!

There’s no shame in taking inventory. There’s no shame in saying I’ve gotten off course, or I need to readjust what I’m doing so I can have those things God wants for me most, instead of just what I want now. There’s also no shame in admitting you can’t do it all. None of us can. We can do a few things at a time well. The key is finding out what those things are for this point in our lives and then doing them with all we have in us.

If your life is full of stress, anxiety, worry, fear, exhaustion, fighting, and inner turmoil, maybe that’s a sign you need to re-prioritize.

1. Silence the noise.
2. Be honest with yourself.
3. Free yourself from other people’s expectations.
4. Get the mind of God.
5. Be clear about your purpose.
6. Create follow-through.
7. Get it done.

 

I haven’t written anything new or earth-shattering, but I hope it helps if you’re feeling a little lost or overwhelmed by life. I know evaluating my priorities is something I need to do often. These steps help me and I hope they will help you too. Let’s make 2018 our best year yet!